Film Review - I Give it a Year (2013)

I Give it a Year stars Rafe Spall as Josh and Rose Byrne as Nat, two people who fall in love and get married within a few months of dating, but the road to married life is rife with bumps and potholes as they will indeed find out for themselves.

As for whether you should find out this movie well I'll be blunt, you shouldn't give this film a minute let alone the 97 the film goes for, the film is unfunny, horrible and at times very distasteful in its tone, I actually sat there going through what would have to be every human emotion known to man as the film went on.

The film also wastes what on paper sounds like a great cast; I mean you have Byrne, Spall, Simon Baker, Anna Faris, Minnie Driver and Steven Merchant but all of them and I mean all of them are wasted, the worst of all is Byrne who is funny and charming and immensely likeable plus she has a great gift for mastering accents as she shows in this movie and when she did an American one in X-Men First Class but here she's left doing a role that was clearly intended for Keira Knightley and if she said no to this well she went up a few notches in my book.

But my main issue with this movie is yet again the horrible treatment dished out to the female characters as they're yelled at, treated like shit and forced into a number of positions that just made me VERY angry, I am really getting fed up not just to the back teeth but to the very top of my head with this sort of shit when it comes to women in the movies, Dan Mazer the man responsible for this garbage as well as the other male writers who try to write women characters in films in this manner should just hang their heads in absolute shame as it is quite frankly well I've lost the words for how much this fucking irritates me.

But you know something else there was a part of me that was actually kind of looking forward to this movie, mainly due to the preview I saw for it making me laugh and thinking "That looks pretty good and I like that cast so I'll keep an eye out for it", how wrong I was as there is no joke that is worth a laugh and the romantic clichés are just that bloody dull you just go "For God's sake just sit down and talk to each other please or better yet MAYBE YOU SHOULDN'T HAVE GOTTEN MARRIED SO FUCKING SOON AFTER YOU STARTED DATING EACH OTHER"

Smegging hell no wonder people wait 2 or 3 years before deciding to propose, at least then you know for sure if you want to spend 20 or 30 years with that person, Jesus some simple logic and common sense could have improved this movie immeasurably but alas it soldiers on in its stupidity in the hope some bloody moron out there will find something to go "Ha Ha Ha Ha" about, fucking hell man go and do something else more fulfilling instead of wasting your time with this fucking rubbish.

And lastly there was one positive I got from this movie and that was my desire for the three supervillains from "Superman II" to come into this movie and kill everyone in it and then trash where they live for good measure, not exactly a traditional positive but it made me smile whilst watching this crap.

So yeah, I Give it a Year is now my leading contender for the worst film of 2013, making me as infuriated as last year's most hated film of mine "Any Questions for Ben?" and like that film it stinks like a dead cat in the middle of the road populated by mean spirited bitchy lice, avoid it at all costs, 0 out of 5.